Tuesday, July 13, 2010

one handed

dear diary,

i like me some avocados. they are tasty little suckers and i could eat them daily if i had the opportunity to. but those tasty little suckers have ruined me. how so?

well thursday i was trying to take the pit out of one at work, making myself a tomato and avocado salad. the knife slipped and i stabbed myself. and when i say stabbed i mean stabbed, the blade, a serrated one no less, when right into the palm of my hand below the knuckle of my middle finger.

blood ensued, and lots of it. as well as pain, and yelling fuck about a half a billion times. my coworkers of course were freaked out, and i am sure the site of me holding a bloody hand wasn't that appealing.

anyway, the emergency team showed up, with a dr, and the dr said i didnt need stitches.

fast forward 9 hours, and i am at the emergency room with blood squirting 6 feet out of my hand, and i apparently had punctured an artery, and possibly severed a nerve.

for the last 5 days i have had half of my middle finger numb.

my hand looks like i punched a brick wall since it is black and blue as a result of the blood flowing into the tissue of my hand.

it is still swollen a bit as a result of all of this.

and now i get to see a hand specialist.

by the way, i typed this, you guessed it, one handed.

so besides being fucking swamped at work, this is my life. a comedy of bloody errors.


  1. oh, man. sorry to hear this; that sounds awful.

  2. What of the Dr who said you didn't need stitches? I hope you are writing him brusque letter of disapproval...one-handed of course.

  3. Okay, not only did I have to endure the blood squirting comment twice, this time I am eating breakfast - eww ;-) But glad you got the stitches...clearly needed, and hopefully you're back to avocado-ing asap! impressive typing skills one handed!

  4. actually no stitches allowed. if more than 6 hours passes from the time of the wound, they will not stitch it because there is a higher risk of infection. just has to heal on its own.

  5. ewww

    I hope it gets better and doesn't leave the hand permanently mangled.

  6. I'm late to hearing about your setback, I know. (I totally take the blame for not keeping up with your blog like I should. I am sorry. I was in love and shit.) But I'll tell you this short story, if it makes you feel better, and it's not to best your hand surgery, but to tell you I understand. I haven't even shared this on my blog yet, I don't think.

    In 2007, I was carrying a plate and a martini glass to the kitchen, tripped over my computer cord and fell face first on the glass. (Very "I Love Lucy", no?) I sliced open the whole right side of my face and had over 100 stitches. Then I had the scar revised a year later -- while I was awake during surgery, which blew -- and it made the scar worse. Through a topical chemotherapy drug injected straight into the scar and laser treatments by a brilliant plastic surgeon, it's not very noticeable anymore.

    Being out of commission sucks. Since I am reading your blog backward, I know you recover relatively well, which is good.

    But goddamn avocados and martini glasses, right?