Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Snomageddon

Dear Diary:

Yes, I know. It has been over a week since my last entry. (Why do I sound like I am in confession when I say this like this? Do I need to say a Hail Mary?) But, I have had a damn good excuse.

See, while you were sitting there all nice and cozy, bundled up in your winter clothes, sipping hot chocolate and bitching about life, I spent the better part of the last 5 days dealing with, well, for lack of a better description, a shit ton of snow.

This all started Thursday really, when the DC metropolitan area began to hunker down for the incoming onslaught of winter weather that was headed our way. Like many, I thought I should head to the grocery store to get a couple of items (and when I say a couple, I literally mean two fucking things), and made my way over there after work.

That my friends was mistake number one. After driving around the parking garage for a good thirty minutes, I found a spot and went inside. You would have swore the store was giving away $100 worth of groceries to the first, oh, I don't know, million people that shopped, because the place was an all out fucking shit show. The lines were easily 20-30 people deep, and the bread aisle looked liked I might as well have been shopping in a communist country. So, after hunting for a basket for ten minutes, I decided to just bail. I had enough food to last me a while, but I was running desperately low on coffee.

Coming home from work Friday wasn't so bad. The streets around the office were clear, but the side roads were trashed by 6pm. I managed to find a spot to park right in front of my house, and I can tell you right now that my car has not moved since I parked it.

I woke up Saturday to a nice big pile of snow. Now, I like snow, don't get me wrong, and I even have a sadistic love of shoveling snow, but what I do not enjoy is digging out the basement apartment at my house for the tenant that lives there, but such is the burden of being a landlord.

Anyway, the amount of snow on the ground was ridiculous. By the time I got done shoveling my walkway in my front yard, there was another inch on my stoop. It just would not let up. Saturday saw two shoveling excursions and shoveling out my car, which was absofuckinglutely buried, was a chore to say the least.

Once it stopped snowing, I did what most people do after you have a ton of snow dumped on you: I went for a walk, right to a bar, and warmed up with beer and shots of tequila.

Sunday saw more shoveling as the bulldozers (yes, way past the point of standard snow plows now) bulldozed the streets and my car was locked behind a three foot pile of snow, which by this point had turned to a lot of ice and was heavy as hell.

So, Diary, the point is this: I have been busy the last few days, so cut me some fucking slack.

PS - More snow to come tonight and tomorrow. Oh joy....

3 comments:

  1. Dear Diary Guy, slack is cut big time. I forgot you lived in DC. I used to live in Buffalo, but now I'm in Charlotte...not as much snow but hot as hell in the summer. Sorry again dude, but great to read you! - Pippi without longstockings

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOL - that was yet, another riot of a read, which I again tweeted ;-) My fave line? You would have swore the store was giving away $100 worth of groceries to the first, oh, I don't know, million people that shopped, because the place was an all out fucking shit show. The lines were easily 20-30 people deep, and the bread aisle looked liked I might as well have been shopping in a communist country.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Holy moly! THIS is why I'm a southern girl...

    Hope it warms up soon!

    ReplyDelete